Internet Sausage Links

Internet Sausage Links

I’ve had it with people indifferent to the way they smell and how it affects other people. I can’t count the number of times I’ve come home with a blazing headache from either too much Axe or too much BO, so good on American Airlines for having the balls to do this – Washington Post

Speaking of stinky, I’m buying these. You’d think people on my side of the world could afford regular showers with soap and water but apparently not, and winter just brings out the worst offenders ever. Come to think of it, summer does too, so maybe I’ll bulk buy these things or something – Amazon

Still on the subject of stinky, Toronto Hydro cut power to the building directly across from us because winter in the True North is hazardous to everything. A pipe burst and flooded their electrical control room, leaving all the residents of a 33-story high-rise without heat, water and light for the past few days.  We checked last night and the lights are on again, but still. Yikes – Global News

In even more stinky news, the Bryan Singer expose is the ripest kind of ripe. On so many levels. If you didn’t already hate him for sticking his fingers into the X-Men reboot and ruining Matthew Vaughn’s vision for the X-Men franchise, this read should do the trick – The Atlantic

I worship at the altar of carbs. Yes, you are absolutely right, I need to stop. Still, this is one of the most blasphemous things you could ever do to a delicious dish of pasta, all in the name of of celebrating a stupid gender reveal party. Yeah stinky is really driving this particular post – New York Post

Internet Sausage Links

Internet Sausage Links

I keep thinking we’ve reached peak insanity, and every day proves I truly have no idea how crazy humans can get. This sounds like a rip-off from the Naruto Shippuden arc where the baddie decides the only way to bring peace on earth is to control everyone by creating a moon he can utilize as an extension of his hypnotic eye jutsu, clearly a ridiculously overwrought fantasy. Enter China, giving that arc a run for its money – Esquire

Hate to be that person, but this guy was kiiiiinda asking for it. Green screen, anyone? – HuffPo

This guy was not – The Globe and Mail

Nope. Nope. Nope. – Buzzfeed

All this really needs is Scott and Tessa doing one of their smoking hot ice dance routines while we gape and marvel at their technical expertise as well as the almost perfect rectangular iceberg – Gizmodo

Being too cheap for cable, I really only get to see The Voice whenever I get to see it. I would advise you not to do this unless you have the rest of your day to spare, because watching Adam and Blake get their competitive bromance on amidst a backdrop of talented singers in one of the best reality TV shows out there is deeply addictive. Kelly Clarkson and J Hud bring their status as Idol alums to bear with some major chemistry this season, which makes it even more fun to watch and if – like me – you love reading TV recaps and watching the mentioned clips, I can’t guarantee you’ll ever emerge from this particular k-hole intact – Rolling Stone

Internet Sausage Links

Internet Sausage Links

If I had a penny for every Facebook status reminding me to wake up because September has ended, I would have enough to buy something at Tim’s. But coffee never works on me, so I use sugar instead. Which is awful.

You know what else is awful? The concept of free bleeding. I would’ve been perfectly happy not knowing what free bleeding is, but I am cursed with the need to know. This week, my pursuit of knowledge is a curse. Free bleeding is when women take going with the flow to an extreme in the name of freedom and the environment. In a nutshell, it’s voluntarily going without tampons, pads, period cups or liners because hygiene and basic human courtesy, like common sense, is on its way out the door – Vice

Another word I learned this week is “scumbro,” which is wonderfully self-explanatory. It’s the perfect term to describe the fashion sensibilities of Justin Bieber and Pete Davidson et al., who are running around in the most ridiculous outfits while remaining inexplicably attractive to women. I say inexplicable because as a nineties child, my idea of attractive is a healthy, corn-fed boybander with squeaky clean hair, non-skinny jeans and clothes that follow a complimentary colour scheme. To my eye, these kids look like everything they own is filched from the local thrift shop, rarely (if ever) bathe, and get dressed blindfolded in the dark. Except they’re mad rich, so the whole thing is purposefully not on purpose, the guy version of the no make-up make-up look. Behold, the rise of the scumbro – Vanity Fair

Apropos of nothing, here’s an interesting take on the Japanese psyche as influenced by the fallout of WWII, anime and the rise of technology. An oldie (2016) but a goodie – The Verge

Why do all my links start with a V today? Let’s go with a C, for children, who are cute, but are also the worst  – CTV

Speaking of C’s, my favourite Chris in the pantheon of Hollywood Chrises said goodbye to Captain America, setting off an avalanche of crying gifs as the internet weeps for its loss. Please, there’s three other Chrises left in the game, with one of them set to do a particularly revealing scene this November on Netflix (to Karen’s utter glee), so we’re all gonna be juuuuust fine. That said, he made for a splendiferous Cap, and the Captain America movies have always been among my MCU faves. You will be missed, Chris Evans.